December 11th is the anniversary of my ordination. It’s a date for me to celebrate and to pause
and reflect. Likewise, I like to think about my fellow priests. Angela, Marisa, and Alice, who
shared this anniversary with me and made their vows on the same day with me. It got me
thinking about this concept of ‘followership.’ I want to reflect on the role of being lead and of
following. In the ordination vows, I followed the lead of my bishop. I was asked personal
questions that could also be considered generic because they are in our Book of Common
Prayer (BCP). All priests who are ordained in the Episcopal Church have been asked these
questions and used these words. From the Episcopal Book of Common Prayer (1978: 531) the
first question is: “Do you believe that you are truly called by God and his church to this
priesthood?” Response: “I believe I am so called.”
Although I responded to this question, I don’t have a video or a mental snapshot of that exact
moment, saying those words. What simple and, likewise, very heavy words, deliberated on and
discerned over many years. I do not need a picture of myself saying those words. I know them
in my spirit, in my heart. On my ordination anniversary, I know how I feel and my state of mind is
clear and vivid to me.
“I believe I am so called.” What does that mean to me? First and foremost, I believe that a God
who is three in one, that is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, worked in my life to help me see, hear,
taste, touch, and smell. I have seen God at work in human beings and in transforming my own
life. I was someone who was shy and self-conscious and God enabled me to be confident and
free. That was a miracle that I could not do myself.
God gave me new ears to hear. The internal change happened and my new perspective was
gained because God spoke to me. He spoke, oftentimes, not in a loud voice but in a still voice,
through human beings. My spiritual mother was instrumental in this. She helped me to declutter
and be able to discern God’s voice. It took different spiritual disciplines to be able to ‘hear’.
Hearing is not a given even though I have two working ears. Hearing and listening to God takes
more than that. It requires a willingness and openness which I didn’t have in my early years in
my spiritual journey and discernment. Foolishness, on my end, was apparent. Arrogant thinking
was couched in thinking that I knew what was best for me regarding my vocation. I was also
torn, seeking the approval of my dad in particular. I took his opinion as God’s truth and yet it was
human advice. Naively, I was never willing to interrogate his views because I wanted his
approval and acceptance. It was in a silent retreat that this truth was brought to me by God. If
my dad did not approve of something, then I was reluctant to embrace it because I equated my
dad’s voice with God’s voice. For example, in my mid-twenties, I was gung ho about ministry,
but my dad had a cautionary tone about me entering ministry. He was not eager for me to be a
pastor or priest.I thought on those occasions my dad knew better. A trust in my father’s advice
meant that I would minimize God’s call on me. It took more years to recognize the difference
between my Heavenly Father and my earthly father’s voice.
So as I reflect on this idea of following God and calling, I was drawn back to a recent read on
leadership research. I learned about followership. Peter G. Northouse’s book on Leadership:
Theory and Practice, mentions the Kelley typology of followers has five types.
● Passive (sometimes pejoratively called ‘sheep’ ): They are the ones who look to the
leader for direction and motivation.
● Conformist: These are the ‘yes people’ who are always on the leader’s side and still
look to the leader for direction and guidance.
● Alienated followers: They are the ones who think for themselves and exhibit a lot of
negative energy over differences of opinion.
● Pragmatist: These are the “fence-sitters “ who support the status quo but do not get on
board until others do.
● Exemplary (“star” followers): They are the ones who are active and positive and offer
independent constructive criticism (2022:356-7)
So as I reflect on God’s calling to follow him and also help lead his church, I am forced to
grapple with what kind of follower I am and what kind of ‘followership’ is cultivated in the space I
occupy. As a priest, I am a follower of God and of the leadership of the diocesan bishop.
Knowingly, as priests, we are representatives of the bishop in our local parishes. What kind of
followership are we fostering? In this new year in my priesthood may I continue to cultivate
credibility, prayerfulness, and courage. Ultimately, may I seek faithfulness to God rather than
‘success’ in my ministry here at St. John’s. May we seek to create together a followership that is
exemplary and passionate, submitted to one another in love.